Saturday, May 7, 2011

Girls, Hearts, Horses, and Fathers (a break from the routine of usual posts)

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I was watching a movie that recently came out about a young girl, her father, horses, and a dream. Questions filled my mind as I watched, and listened for what God was speaking to my own heart.

What is it that touched me so when I saw this young girl being told by her father how much he loved her, would protect her, and was proud of her? Why, when she was told by everyone else to go one way, she listened to her heart and went another, why does this rock me to my core? What is it that makes my heart yearn to be out in the wilderness, and to experience that something...that something that is wild and untamed in the heart of our country...that somehow a horse holds the secret to?

There is something within the heart of us as women...something that we carry within as little girls, that never leaves as we grow with time. Something fierce, determined, a desire to fulfill that purpose that is destined for us, a role no one else can fill. This be free...that influences our hearts to love...and to be loved.

There is still something within me that yearns for this love, freedom, and adventure. All women, at some point I'm sure, recognize this within themselves. As little girls, we intuitively know...but somehow, as we grow up, so many of us loose that foresight. That integral knowing in our hearts...what we were made for, that we are loved, that it's ok to dream, and that we need our fathers.

I know in my heart, that I long for these things. I think sometimes that I may have been cheated, that I missed something...that without them, I can't truly understand who I am or where I am going. But then....then I am reminded. I am reminded that God is the ultimate Father, and He gives me this love, everyday. Every. Day. Often I don't see it. Still, I must choose to see. God is always the answer, because He Himself is love.

As to the other things...I can't explain why I've always loved horses, or prayed since I was a little girl to have one of my own. :-) But I realize, regardless, that there is something that speaks of the beauty of God in the wilderness, and in the wildness of a horse. A beauty, which I know is also inside myself, if I would allow Jesus to show it to me.

And we all know, life is an adventure itself. But to live that adventure, to really live it, needs more. More of ourselves given. Given in love. I pray I will continue this journey. To know more...and to learn what is in the heart of God that speaks to my own heart. He is there. He is waiting with open arms. I must only approach the throne of His Heart as a little girl to her Father...and then, there is nothing left that I could want.

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